play the game

Sitting in "ma chambre" in Moreuil and thinking about tomorrow. I will finally be going to Paris to stay... for a while at least. I'm packed, know what I'm wearing tomorrow and I have the address of where I need to be by 2 P.M., but I am I ready?

Moreuil, Amiens, Fort-Mahon are all cities I've visited multiple times. I've returned, slept in the same beds, looked out the same windows, and talked to the same people. They've all become, in some way or another, second homes for me. Jean-Claude and Claudie have been like grandparents to me, as even my friend Leah noticed, and I couldn't have asked better circumstances to start off my study-abroad experience.

However, tomorrow is another place. More people, more views, and probably more work for me to communicate. I've grown so accustomed to Claudie's strong Picard accent (She's my favorite) that it will be weird to listen to Parisians all the time. Will I love it like I've always dreamed? Will I consider it a second home, or rather third?

Today, Claudie gave me some advice. She said, "Tatiana, I don't say this to make you angry, but you're too serious.. you need to smile more... your face doesn't always reflect joy". This made me laugh. Oh, the French. I understood what she was saying, but to me it didn't make much sense. She was telling me what she saw, but to me, it wasn't the same as what I know. What do I know? That I love to laugh and smile and joke, but sure, sometimes I am serious. I told her to ask my family and friends, the people that see me all the time.
So what do you do when foreigners tell you how you are? Do you change for them or just flat out get angry? Neither. You, as my mom would say, "play the game".

I don't want to compartmentalize the French, but from my experience I have noticed they are less open than Americans with a lot of things. Notably, their private problems and their feelings. They probably would never blog about things like this ;) . Oh well, je m'en fiche. When someone reveals more than happiness on their face, even if they're not sad, there could be a problem. They tell you what they think, and it's weird if you're upset about it. You kind of just have to take it. It's a weird and new thing I haven't quite understood, but I'm learning how to more and more each time I come here. Does that mean I want to be like that? No, but nobody's perfect, including me, and it's hard to change some things.

Rules of The Game:
1. Know who you are and what you want.
2. Listen to the opinions and advice of others, and take what you need to accomplish and improve your goal(s).
3. Need to vent? Go to someone who cares (Seriously, I'm not trying to be sarcastic).
4. Last, but not least... Smile.

So to answer my first question, I don't know if I'm "ready" for Paris, but who really is ever ready for the unexpected? I have my things packed, but as for everything else, I'll figure it out. Classes. Apartment. Professors. And so much more. I'll take some of Claudie's advice and smile, but for the most part I'll focus on what I want out of this trip and make it happen. Take the good, leave the bad, and move forward.

Bon voyage!